How many country & western singers does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the bulb and two to sing about the old one. [Tweet This]
There were two people walking down the street. One was a musician. The other didn't have any money either. [Tweet This]
What happens if you play country music backwards? Your wife returns to you, your dog comes back to life, and you get out of prison. [Tweet This]
What kind of music do mummies like best? Wrap. [Tweet This]
Why are there so many clarinets in a concert band? It increases the odds that one will play the right note. [Tweet This]
How do trumpet players traditionally greet each other? Hi. I’m better than you. [Tweet This]
What’s the difference between God and a band director? God doesn’t think he’s a band director. [Tweet This]
What’s the difference between God and a conductor? God doesn’t think he’s a conductor. [Tweet This]
Why is the singer out on the porch? Doesn't have the key and doesn't know when to come in. [Tweet This]
How do you get a guitar player to play quietly? Put a chart in front of him. [Tweet This]
How do you know a drummer's outside your door? His knocking speeds up and he doesn't know when to come in. [Tweet This]
What's the range of the viola? -- As far as you can throw it. [Tweet This]
Young boy says to his mother: "Mom, when I grow up I want to be a musician" She replies: "Well honey, you know you can't do both". [Tweet This]
How do you spell 'drummer' in Chinese? No Thai Ming. [Tweet This]
What's the difference between a banjo and an onion? Nobody cries when you cut a banjo in half. [Tweet This]
Where's the safest place to hide your valuables? In an accordion case. [Tweet This]
How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just steal somebody else's light. [Tweet This]
What's the difference between a sensitive singer/songwriter and a puppy?..eventually the puppy stops whining. [Tweet This]
How many sopranos does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one - she holds it up and the world revolves around her. [Tweet This]
How many record producers does it take to change a light bulb? Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?" . [Tweet This]
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